Hopelessly behind!

I have so many comments I want to go back and leave. I have so many things that I want to write about, and a few more pictures that need posting (for Philip, at least - even if no one else wants to see). I'm so behind in my LJ life at the moment, and it's because the weather has just been so gorgeous this week that I've just not had the time to sit here at the computer and stay updated. On the other hand, I miss you peeps!

I will catch up. Next week I'll be sitting here bored. I won't be making sure that all things are set for attending a birthday party and also throwing a birthday party. I won't still be worried about my devotional because it will be over by Monday morning. And other things, too - I'm sure there are other things that I won't be doing. Yes, next week is the time to catch up.

*zonk*

The letter.

I realized tonight that it's been about 2 weeks since I last logged in to Philip's email and cleaned out the spam and stuff. When I realized this, I was ashamed for having forgotten to do so, and I immediately jumped to the task.

While doing so, I accidentally found something I'm sure I wasn't supposed to find. In his webmail, I noticed that the Drafts folder contained a message - this is the first time I've seen that. Curiosity compelled me to look...

I wish I could turn back time. I really, really do. This heart will never forget that awful message.

Philip wrote me a goodbye letter. One to me and his mom. In case he doesn't come back.

I'm bawling. I'm numb. I'm sick. I want to erase it from my mind forever, and yet... I'm so touched that he thought to do something like this. And I'm so scared that he thought it a real enough possibility that he would need to.

*sobs*